Positive You by Chezda
This is one of the major issue or challenge that affects most people and in different ways depending on the mindset state of someone. This week I want us to focus of confidence of a child especially teenagers in secondary school. Let’s look at the definition of self-confidence,according to the dictionary,it is a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities and judgement or feeling of self-assurance arising from an appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. I remember that when I was young, I experienced a lot of bullying, was body shamed,had self-doubt and self judgement which really affected my confidence in a negative way.
I used to love the idea of participating in beauty pageants (mmabontle), but everytime I would think about what people always said about my rickets and how I was not beautiful but looked like a boy instead. Would then start judging and doubting myself, ending up disqualifying myself even before entering at all because I believed I was not good enough. Low self-esteem/confidence may stem from experiences in early childhood like how it started with me at primary school.
If a child doesn’t fit in at school, has difficulty meeting their parents’ expectations or are neglected or abused, this can lead a child to have negative core beliefs about themselves. Some of the causes that children face is bullying from their family members, their peers at school or even the society at large. Mental health problems , disability; genetics; illness; physical abilities; socioeconomic status and discrimination can also cause low self-esteem. One may ask, how will I notice as a child that I am lacking confidence or as a parent how do I notice that that my child is lacking confidence or is having low self-esteem.
Some of the signs include; not accepting compliments, avoiding challenges for fear of failing and embarrassment. Being overly upset by disapproval or criticism, feeling sad, depressed, anxious, ashamed, angry or worthless. I remember when I was struggling with low self-esteem/confidence, whenever I would think of entering a competition, my heart would beat fast, I would start experiencing diarrhea, would feel sick because I was scared of losing and failure. I didn’t enjoy my life because I kept battling anxiety, fear and even night mares. Continues next week......
I used to love the idea of participating in beauty pageants (mmabontle), but everytime I would think about what people always said about my rickets and how I was not beautiful but looked like a boy instead. Would then start judging and doubting myself, ending up disqualifying myself even before entering at all because I believed I was not good enough. Low self-esteem/confidence may stem from experiences in early childhood like how it started with me at primary school.
If a child doesn’t fit in at school, has difficulty meeting their parents’ expectations or are neglected or abused, this can lead a child to have negative core beliefs about themselves. Some of the causes that children face is bullying from their family members, their peers at school or even the society at large. Mental health problems , disability; genetics; illness; physical abilities; socioeconomic status and discrimination can also cause low self-esteem. One may ask, how will I notice as a child that I am lacking confidence or as a parent how do I notice that that my child is lacking confidence or is having low self-esteem.
Some of the signs include; not accepting compliments, avoiding challenges for fear of failing and embarrassment. Being overly upset by disapproval or criticism, feeling sad, depressed, anxious, ashamed, angry or worthless. I remember when I was struggling with low self-esteem/confidence, whenever I would think of entering a competition, my heart would beat fast, I would start experiencing diarrhea, would feel sick because I was scared of losing and failure. I didn’t enjoy my life because I kept battling anxiety, fear and even night mares. Continues next week......
