Hope for my people
Last week I wrote about my experiences with dating and the importance of disclosing one’s HIV status early on in these relationships. Although I first tested HIV positive in 2007, I was in denial of the results up until I decided to test again in 2010. During these three years, I was eager to learn new things about HIV/AIDS. Everything that was said and how I physically appeared went hand in hand. It was a wakeup call for me. I was weak. I lost a lot of weight; even my skin colour had changed. I also had a herpes zoster. The first person I told was my cousin who I confided in because of how we got along. I urge people to always weigh their priorities, make informed decisions on who you are disclosing to as some take it as a laughable thing. In 2010 when I came back from the clinic with my health card written a bold “positive,” I got home and gave my elder sister my patient record where “positive” appeared in bold font. I expected judgment, criticism, and rejection, but it came out the opposite. She was supportive and her husband, from whom I also expected the worst, told me ‘o seka wa itlhoboga o tla fola, (don’t give up now, you will be alright.)
They were my source of support, and their love gave me more and more strength each day. Disclosing my status to my family was the best thing ever as I came to realise that sharing with them how I live actually made life easier. It was comforting to know that they would help by reminding me to take my medication in time and go for my check-ups. I then went to the University of Botswana grounds to meet my best friend whom I had not seen in a while and she didn’t even know I was ill. When I met her she asked what was wrong and I told her I had been ill and that I was HIV positive. She shook her head and laughed it off as she thought I was joking. From her reaction, I undertook to start telling people I trusted, who were close to me. It took me going public in 2017 to encourage the younger generation like me to disclose their HIV statuses. The feedback that I am getting from my peers is amazing; they are very supportive and willing to change their lives for the better. This inspires me to work hard to change our generation for the better. Even though we still have people who prefer to stay quiet on issues relating to HIV, I say even if you are not infected, you are still affected.