3RDi

Should MPs be called ‘Honourable’?

Shocking news from the Lobatse High Court where a judge alleges that the Minister for State President, Kabo Morwaeng, called him at night in a bid to get him to keep Lobatse MP, Dr. Thapelo Matsheka locked up. We don’t know whether this did or didn’t happen but if it did, then it would be the reason for the National Assembly to change the titles that it uses for MPs. The title used for judges is “Your Honour” and its variant (“Honourable”) is used for MPs. This linguistic state of affairs can be confusing for MPs and some of them may believe that this similarity entitles them to some measure of judicial authority. While accepting that they are not judges and can’t set out legal reasoning, some MPs may assume that being called “Honourable” means that they can suggest the outcome of cases that come before judges. It remains unclear why politicians have to be called by this title when they already have those they bring from freedom squares – like “Motho!” in the case of the ruling party and “Comrade” in the case of the opposition.

Matsheka should increase amount of lawsuit claim

Following a three-day ordeal that entailed arrest, detention and a brief appearance in court, Dr. Thapelo Matsheka is suing the state for P11 million. In his court papers, he assigns a million pula sum to each one of those episodes of his ordeal – which is a novelty. That is a hell lot of money but the state should consider itself lucky because the Lobatse MP could have sued for much more. He could have sued for being denied a king-sized bed, four-course meal and mineral water as well as for exposure to 12th-century sights, smells and tactile sensations. Those who drive government vehicles typically don’t care an awful lot about the damage that potholes do. This means that Matsheka was shaken like flu medication over more than 20 potholes on the road between Lobatse Prisons and the High Court. He should demand P300 000 for each pothole per trip.

Threaten pornstar with Mozambique

There is this cross-dressing guy who is all over town and on social media. One too many attention seekers limit their antics to social media but this guy insists on being in people’s faces both online and offline. In a period of time when the meaning of “entertainment” has been peculiarly corrupted, this guy qualifies as an entertainer and his brand of entertainment is of the most peculiar kind. When he is not sexually assaulting an on-stage loudspeaker at a music concert, he is live-streaming himself breathing heavily on top of a future ex-girlfriend – or announcing plans to get married or prancing around the streets almost naked but for a diaper or meat (yes, meat) covering his overworked crown jewels. He has become a bit too much because he occupies the physical space that he shares with people who stay off social media in order to avoid interaction with “entertainers” like him. But how do you get him to stop? Simple: the government should intervene and say it is sending him to Mozambique to entertain troops deployed there. Hopefully, that will force him to focus on another one of his vocations – preaching. It turns out that he also qualified as a preacher recently. At least in church, his audience of victims would be limited to volunteers.

Is Bushiri still a man of God?

Shepherd Bushiri both self-identifies as a man of God and is so-called by his followers. Let’s process the evidence though. Bushiri has been implicated in a gold-smuggling scam and when he should have stuck around Pretoria to clear his name, he was whisked away to Lilongwe in a getaway presidential jet from his home country, Malawi. On account of having obviously engaged in criminal activity, which is ungodly, Bushiri can’t insist on being called a man of God. However, on account of having dabbled in gold-smuggling, Bushiri can indeed be rightly called a man of gold. In sum, Bushiri is a man of gold, not a man of God.

Govt should target kombi/taxi operators

Think you broke? You are not, the Botswana government is. The government is so broke that since last year, it has been picking the pockets of both citizens and non-citizens via a slew of taxes. It has also downgraded some of the services it has traditionally provided, forcing members of the public to fend for themselves. Government health facilities have run out of medication, forcing patients to buy from pharmacies. Every indication is that free education is ending this year. One other result is that potholes on public roads have gone unrepaired for years and some have become basins. Oddly, there is a group of people that the government could very easily target and properly raise money from public transport operators, who break the Road Traffic Act every 10 metres of a journey. As a matter of fact, some traffic cops have long relied on these operators to raise petrol and groceries money.