Growing concern: Women warned against marriage wrecking
In what Gender Based Violence (GBV) activist, Lopang Gorewang describes as an indication that society has lost its morals and values, a trend has developed in our society where some women have no problem dating married men and even bearing their children.
According to Gorewang, these are usually women who are so envious of others that they would even go to the extent of planning to destroy successful marriages. Gorewang observes that most of the time, such home wreckers target public figures including politicians, celebrities, businessman and pastors.
“The relationship would usually start as a secret affair until the woman gets pregnant. In worst cases, the women don't talk about the pregnancy until a situation where suddenly, a baby is born. That is when they start blackmailing the men by either posting threats on social media platforms about the infidelity or demanding things like cash and clothes in the name of the child,” Gorewang said.
Reported cases, he said, have shown that some women would even go to the extent of calling the man’s wife or insulting her through texts, while in the worst cases, the women would send evidence of their affair in the form of pictures and videos.
Gorewang said this usually works for the ‘side chicks’ because the men will do anything in their power to meet the demands of their mistresses in order to protect their public image or status.
“This kind of behaviour from our sisters should be condemned as it leads to a high rate of divorces; and incidents like that also cause depression, with some men even going to the extent of committing suicide,” he said, noting further that some women are opportunists as they use pregnancy as leverage.
The President of Gaborone Phase 4 Customary Court Kgosi Arnold Somolokae confirms that it is common phenomenon nowadays, where they receive such cases of home wrecking involving children. Somolekae said these cases are often complicated to resolve, and should just be avoided where possible.
He thus urges women who find themselves destroying other people’s marriages to be aware of laws governing such issues. The law allows for the wife to sue for marriage wrecking.
Kgosi Somolekae is convinced that phenomenon contributes significantly to growing statistics of GBV. He is concerned that such incidents erode Setswana culture that dikgosi subscribe to.